- Save
Aka“this sandwich won’t bite, I promise” guy, aka wait, is he going to cook this kitty cat?—may or may not be dating star of such Certified Fresh movies as Chef and Topher Grace-masterwork, In Good Company: the one, the only, the Scarlett Johansson about a week ago, news broke that Bobby Flay—aka hamburgler fuccboi.
Scarlett Johansson is 32-years-old, and perhaps probably the most stunning ladies on the earth. She’s additionally a fabulous actress, and something of the very bankable movie movie stars in Hollywood. Her in Translation? Unbelievable. Her free-spirited neuroticism in Vicky Christina Barcelona and Match aim? First class. And He’s Simply Not That Towards You. That has been a film that has been made as soon as.
Bobby Flay, on the other hand, is 52. He’s a Food System celebrity. Along with his title appears like the generic form of a title that gets offered at Walgreens for half the purchase price.
I did so the mathematics. IT DOESN’T ADD UP. (I ALSO DON’T KNOW SIMPLE TIPS TO DO MATH!)
Therefore I asked myself a rather question that is simple asked myself for completely different purposes nearly every morning since November:
exactly How did we arrive here? And much more especially: if they’re certainly dating—which, who knows—how did Scar Jo get here?
Below, I’ve compiled an incomplete selection of Scarlett Johansson’s paramours, in approximately chronological purchase. This may assist us get yourself a better image of what’s going on here.
2002Scarlett Johansson dated Fun. guitar player, Bleachers man and otherwise big style music producer Jack Antonoff for just two years in senior school, during the expert Children’s class (listed here is a photo of this valedictorian).
2004AScarlett Johansson ended up being romantically associated with Jude that is 31-year-old Law then 12 years her senior. She additionally had intercourse with Benicio del Toro in a elevator in the Chateau Marmont, which can be precisely the form of thing individuals who’ve never ever visited the Chateau Marmont (me) would expect you’ll happen during the Chateau Marmont. She ended up being apparently seeing Patrick Wilson, too. There clearly was a pattern right here: older dudes.
2005She includes a fling with notorious lady’s guy Jared Leto, hence starting her age-appropriate dudes period.
2005-2007Johansson dates perma-teen-hearthrob Josh Hartnett for 2 yrs. It’s her very first genuine relationship since Antonoff in вЂ02.
2008-2011Our woman goes right from Hartnett to Ryan Reynolds, who she marries. It’s a pretty lateral move taste-wise.
2011Scarlett gets divorced and would go to Mexico with Sean Penn.
2012Scarlett begins Nate that is dating Naylor a ny advertising exec whom, based on people who understand him, has a watch for risqué art and seems like Morrissey in his prime. That’s high praise for a normal individual to get. For contextualization sake, I’ve just ever been in comparison to Matthew Perry, but less during their prime, and much more during the years he had been coked down on Friends.
2012-2016Scarlett times, then marries, then divorces French journalist/editor Romain Dauriac.
2017Scarlett had been connected to SNL Weekend improve co-host Colin Jost as belated as asian wife might, which everybody else sort of universally agrees to be a win that is huge Colin Jost. And today, finally, it might be Flay’s change.
Okay, time for you to come back to our original concern: just how did we arrive here?
Well, after meticulously Homeland-ing my entire bed room with photos and magazine clippings and different-colored yarns—i got myself the spools during the Yarn shop, it is a place—we arrived up with all the explanation that is following. I’ve used dashes to separate your lives the points, to help you carry on with.
-2002 to approximately 2005 we are able to essentially discount because of Scarlett Johansson being truly a newly famous 19-year-old starlet in Hollywood. It absolutely was, as individuals state, a period. Completely understandable behavior. Particularly doing del Toro in a elevator. If you were a starlet involving the many years of 19-24 between 2003-2006, it had been essentially a rite of passage to own intercourse with del Toro in a resort lift.* After all, you dudes have experienced 21 Grams, right?
*Backed up by zero proof.
-2005 to 2011 is just about the “Oh wait we can essentially date any guy i would like” period. We have Hartnett. We have Reynolds. Two severe relationships with two seriously usually good-looking dudes.
-2011 (cont.): Classic rebound situation, going from an individual who smiles on a regular basis (Reynolds) to somebody whoever face is kind of stuck in a permanent snarl (Penn’s face).
-2012 to 2016 discovers Scarlett with two good-looking guys that are successfulNaylor and Dauriac) that are however maybe maybe not part of the Hollywood elite. After dating actors for way too long, this will be a reasonable departure. Plus, hot innovative execs are the actors of normal individuals.
-Post-divorce, 2017 is probably Scarlett’s many year that is interesting date. Jost is sort of a throwback into the clean-cut actors that are reynolds-esque. And Flay is like the total outcome of a) returning to her 19-year-old older-guy-phase; and b) starring in Chef in 2014. Her toggling involving the two is novel, yet also predictable: she’s been toggling between a Jost and a Flay within one means or another her whole life that is dating.
For whatever reason, I’m 76% yes she’ll date Anthony Bourdain next.
- Save
Sam Eichner likes literary works, truth tv along with his cats that are twin. He’s consistently been told he requires a shave since he began growing undesired facial hair.
Lägg Till Kommentar